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Bulletproof


Mmm. This one of these really borderline movies. You sometimes feel like it’s the worst film you’ve ever seen, but sometimes you’re like, well, it’s not that bad, I’m having a good time. It’s one of those countless 90s buddy cop movies that rip off classics like “48 Hours” and “Lethal Weapon”. The recipe is simple. You take two stars that appear to be opposite, throw in some male bonding, a bunch of shoot-outs and stunts and a load of jokes and you hope the whole thing sticks. Here, we get Adam Sandler as a white lowlife crook and Damon Wayans as a black undercover cop who befriends him for a year only to then bust his ass. It’s an okay premise that could develop into a conventional but enjoyable movie, but unfortunately, there has been many mishaps in the cooking.

First of all, the story really sucks ass, bad. It’s incredible how botched the script is. Not only are the twists predictable and tired, they also don’t make any sense. When Wayans bust Sandler, Sandler shoots him in the head by accident. The cop survives, but he’s still pissed. Sandler’s drug lord boss is mad at him and wants him dead, and somehow, the former friends are brought back together to track the villain, or something like this. I know my plot summary is confused, but that’s pretty much how the film puts it. Every important twist is gone oven in half a second. The characters’ behavior is so unbelievable! I know, I know, this is bullshit Hollywood cinema, and I usually don’t mind, but there’s something more. I don’t care if a movie’s written like shit as long as it’s entertaining. Yet Bulletproof is a very lame action film. The action scenes are painfully generic, and the direction is as bland as it gets. Yeah, the film is technically okay, but there’s absolutely no style.

As for the comedy, it’s too uneven. I’m a huge Adam Sandler fan, but this is definitively not the right vehicle for him. Despite a few hilarious scenes, most of the film takes itself way too seriously. As for Damon Wayans, I’m not a big fan of him and his brothers. Is it me or they’re all wannabes? They can seldom be amusing, but they don’t have the wit of an Eddie Murphy or a Will Smith. So, basically, this film ain’t really worth seeing. It’s lame even on braindead movie standards. Its action is miles from any Bruckheimer noisefest, and it packs less laughs than the worst SNL-type 90s comedy. If you wanna see a brilliant modern buddy cop flick, I recommend you the immensely entertaining Jackie Chan-Chris Tucker vehicle “Rush Hour”, which has both kick ass action and hilarious comedy. As for Sandler, you should check out “The Wedding Singer”, which showcases his humor way better. Forget “Bulletproof”!