That’s from the Bloodhound Gang’s Hell Yeah, in which Jimmy Pop sings about what he would do if God lent him his powers. Imagine if it was Jim Carrey who would become the Almighty Lord, that’d make a good movie, right? HEAVENS NO! Don’t get me wrong, I love Carrey. Ever since “Ace Ventura: Pet Detective”, I enjoyed every new movie showcasing Jim Carrey’s goofy faces, over the top delivery and wild physical comedy. I was also fascinated to see Carrey try different things in more dramatic films like The Truman Show or Man on the Moon

Now Jim is back with what looked like an inconsequential but fun high concept comedy, like the hilarious Liar, Liar, but appearances are deceiving my friends. “Bruce Almighty” is even more conventional and preachy than The Majestic, and it’s as boring as a dog’s ass. Speaking of dogs, you know the bit in the trailer where Carrey-as-God makes his dog use the toilet and flush? That’s it. That’s the extent of this film’s comedic genius. You might find that amusing (I don’t), but don’t expect much more silly sight gags.

What you get is a long, long first act setting up Bruce (Carrey) as an unlucky reporter always assigned to the wacky! general interest stories (kind of like Bill Murray’s character in the infinitely better Groundhog Day) who’s angry at the big guy upstairs. Then God (played by Morgan Freeman) hears Bruce’s call and decides to give him His job to see if he can do better, and for a stretch we get goofy (but dumb and unfunny) stuff. There were endless possibilities here for all kinds of absurdity, satire or whatnot, but all we get is a dog on the toilet. Ha. It gets even worse when the film seemingly forgets all about the God stuff to focus on dullsville relationship blues between Bruce and his girlfriend (an utterly wasted Jennifer Aniston

“Bruce Almighty” was directed by Tom ShadyHACK, a talentless filmmaker if there ever was one. You might point out that he did make the first “Ace Ventura” and Liar, Liar, but even those films were cheap-looking and clumsily crafted. Still, ShadyHACK was able to make us laugh, or at least to stay out of Carrey’s way, but that was before ShadyHACK started feeling self-important and New-Agey. This led to the one-two crap-punch of “Patch Adams” and Dragonfly and, even now that’s he back working with Carrey, he remains stuck into by-the-numbers pseudo-spiritual trite sentimentalism. “Be the miracle!” I’m surprised ShadyHACK didn’t wheel in little kids with cancer…

You know how many times I laughed during “Bruce Almighty”? ZERO! Oh, I did smile a few times at Jim’s typical scenery-chewing, but even then that was mixed with pity for how the script is so worthless that Carrey has to slapstick himself to death and ad lib nonsense to try to liven things up. “Is that your final answer?” How desperately uninspired can you get? I’ve seen more wit in straight-to-video Ernest flicks. This is by far the worst movie Carrey has ever starred in.

Posted on May 23, 2003January 3, 2014Author KevinCategories Movie Reviews